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I have been sitting here trying to write this freaking college essay all day! AND I'M NOT GETTING ANYWHERE! at this point I have almost nothing accomplished, I can't concentrate, and I'm getting a head ache. My mind is drifting to every corner of the world, further and further away from where it needs to be. I keep going to in cycles of thinking, I really want to stay here, because here is safe, here is fimilair, here is home. And then I'll switch to, I have to leave, I have to get out of here, I have to go see the world. Right now I'm in mode number two. The only thing is I will never be able to do that until I finish my college apps. And THAT'S NOT GOING WELL. Right now I wish I was on a plane to almost anywhere. Everywhere seems more exciting than here. I have nothing to look forward to in the comming months, life has become very mundane and predictable. I just want something exciting and good to happen! I am bored with my life right now. Maybe not even bored, maybe just unsatisfied. but the thing is I'm not sure how to change it. For right now I feel stuck. Ahhhhh! Every single day it is the same thing. Not that that's bad, but every now and then something has to change. There is absolutly nothing exciting coming up. Some people may think christmas is exciting, but really how is it that exciting? There are no presents I'm dying for, there's no exotic location that we're going to, there's no really fun plans that have been made. It's really too far away to start getting exciting. And what do I have next week? A full week of boring boring school. Oh look it's the end of November and I'm still not done applying to college. The more I think about it, the more I'm not sure what I want to do, or where I want to go. I want to leave the US for a while, go explore other countries, find something . But until I get my college stuff done I won't even be able to go out and explore this small town of Hillsboro.