Gangsta Christmas

In the spirit of the holiday season here's a little satire I wrote based on "Twas the Night Before Christmas"


Gangsta Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the crib
Not a gangsta was stirring, not even the notorious BIG
The nines were hung on the bedposts with care
In hopes that no brawl would soon break out there

Kanye and 50 were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of Benjamins danced in their heads
Lil John with his goblet and ice in his lap
Had just settled down after his little night cap

When out on the green there rose such a fizzle
Snoop sprang from his bed to see what’s the dizzle
Away to his cellar he flew like flash
Tore open the door and protected his stash

The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
Gave the illusion of bling scattered below
When what to Snoop’s wondering eyes should appear
But a group of his homies had just rolled in here

With Beyonce so pretty standing there with the key
Snoop knew in a moment it had to be J-Z
More rapid than coppers his pose they came
And he whopped and he hollered and called them by name;

Now Bow Wow! Now Ghost Face! Now Fat Joe and Scrappy
Yea Missy yeah Marshal lets make them all happy
From the New York Bronx to the LA ghetto
Rap battle rap battle don’t sing in false setto

As they circled up like hungry dogs before feeding
They knew one side would be delivered a beating
So they started a beat so hot and so new
The disses began flying; some didn’t know what to do

And then in a twinkling, Snoop heard from the pool
And voice so collected and smooth and so cool
As snoop drew out his switch blade and was turning around
In came Usher with a leap and a bound

He was dressed all in fur, he and his bonny
It was only the best, of course from Armani
His medallion shown loaded with bling
As he strutted in and started to sing

Luda at his side, with a dog named Milton
Right behind them walked in the infamous Paris Hilton
Lil John soon joined them, as they began to get krunk
The song they were singing it was a slam-dunk

He sprang to his Benz and started to dance
Did the lean back and pulled up his pants
Not worried that any of them would get caught
The best thing to do then was drop it like it’s hot

As he started his car with shorty by his side
They pulled out of the gate for a short joy ride
Then came the sirens, the fuzz, they were here
They had come to break up the party of the year

Usher stayed cool, and stepped on the gas
The cops right behind him gaining real fast
Wanting to flout, he began to shot
Everybody get down, peace up, A town!

Last day till Christmas break

So tomorrow is the last day before Christmas break, and I feel like crap right now, so I don't think I'll be going to school tomorrow. Plus I have a math test that if I went I'd just fail. ahh its just a good feeling going into a situation where you know you'll fail (can you tell I'm being sarcastic?) anyways, I don't really are, I'll be doing homework over the break for sure, and I know I'll be having tutoring sessions, but tomorrow I'm out of here! San Fran baby!! Then when I get back I get to go Christmas shopping and snowboarding, what more could I ask for? I think this will be one of the best Christmas breaks ever, even if I can't just kick back the whole time, and heck maybe if I study hard enough by the time break is over I'll understand math. That would be an amazing Christmas present.

OColicous

Wow, I haven't seen the OC in two whole weeks, and boy have I ever missed a lot. I am so out of the loop, when did Julie Cooper and her ex start sleeping together? And what's up with Seth and summer? I heard something about a new girl friend? Oh man, and then the episodes to come... Oh man it looks intense. Julie paying off the pool boy to stop seeing Marrisa, and then Marrisa holding hands with another girl, is she bi????? Oh man and not to mention that Cal has a love child he never told Kirsten about, and now Seth and Ryan's girl friend are related. oh man, this season looks like its shaping up to be a good one!

Soft porn or elegant?

I assume you've seen the new Victoria Secret's add, the one with carol of the bells playing in the background and the girls saying stuff like, "say you want me, say you need me... ect." well my mom says their commercials are like soft porn, but I really like them. I think they are so well done, and I love the music, and how they did the lighting, and I just think it makes everything look so elegant. I mean heck it makes me want to go out and buy their underwear, haha. Yeah sure I guess it is a little on the promiscuous side to have girls prancing around in their underwear, but that's how all their commercials are, and really that's how all underwear commercials are. But if you don't look at it from the sexual point of view, which I'm sure very few people do, the commercials are really good. They really are a work of art. The lighting, the music, and filming all go together so well, and just, a really good commercial. haha, maybe its just me, but I really like them.

I finally have a phone again

So funny story... The morning of winter formal, I was helping to decorate the school and we needed the balloons that Eric said he was going to bring. So I played phone tag with him for a while and then when I finally got him, I was inside this school and it cut out. So I tried to call him back and it said my battery was low and wouldn't let me call anyone. So then I got mad and just turned off my phone and stuck it in my back pocket. Well right after that I was helping tape this tarp thing to the bleachers and while we were on top of them it feel down the crack, but didn't fall all the way, or else we would have been able to reach under and get it. So I ended up just waiting until the next time they pulled out the bleachers to get it, and that was tonight, so that works out great, I have a phone now, all I have to do is charge it.

Count down to winter break

Well I must admit that winter formal was a little disappointing. On a scale of one to ten, ten being just so awesome you can't stand it, and 1 being I didn't come home alive, I'd have to rate it about a 4. It sucked pretty bad. No one could hear the music, and they were playing crappy songs. After wasn't too bad though. We had some fun adventures. Also today all the people who went to NY for deca will be coming home, so that's good. They're all fun people, and I have to admit I did miss them at winter formal. Tomorrow is Monday the 13th, and do you know what that means??? It means this is the last week before winter break. Even better, I get to go to San Francisco for the first 3 days, who could ask for anything more.